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This is Alex
EN FR
03 · My journal

What I have tried,
what I have learned.

These are experience reports, not recommendations. I write them as they happen. Some things work, some do not, some I am still figuring out.

2026 9 entries

Scattered Minds by Gabor Maté: the book that changed everything for me

The first book that made me understand ADHD differently. Not as a deficit, but as the brain’s response to its environment.

Taking Charge of Adult ADHD by Russell Barkley: what this book taught me

The most rigorous adult ADHD manual I have read. Executive function frame, stimulant medication, life strategies. Not the warmest book, but the most precise.

Trop intelligent pour être heureux by Siaud-Facchin: a French book that gave me words

I read it at 26, right after my giftedness diagnosis. The book that put words on things I could not name, even if it never saw the ADHD underneath.

ADHD 2.0 by Hallowell and Ratey: the recent science of ADHD

The Variable Attention Stimulus Trait reframe, the Task-Positive and Default Mode networks, exercise as real treatment. Useful, except when it edges into romanticizing.

Annick Vincent’s ADHD book: the French-language reference for newly diagnosed patients

The Quebec psychiatrist writes for patients. Glasses-for-the-brain metaphor, diagnosis, medication, living with. The book I would give a freshly diagnosed friend.

Driven to Distraction at Work by Hallowell: a book about focus, not ADHD

The title misleads. It isn’t the 1994 classic. It’s a 2014 book on focus at modern work, with an ADHD appendix. Useful for anyone who feels scattered without a diagnosis.

Wellbutrin for ADHD: what the research actually says

Bupropion comes up constantly in ADHD discussions. I never took it. So I dug into what the research actually says, and where it stops.

A real but modest effect. Not a first-line treatment.

Strattera for ADHD: how a non stimulant medication works

The best known non-stimulant. It works differently from Ritalin, slower, on a different system. What that means in practice.

Slower, gentler, worth knowing about. A decision for your doctor.

How an ADHD adult thinks: how my brain has worked since the diagnosis

The start-up that refuses to engage, parallel trains of thought, time blindness, emotional amplification, paradoxical memory. What my diagnosis taught me about my own head.

My brain is not broken. It works differently, with its cost and its benefit.
2025 20 entries

Everything I wish I had found when I started looking for answers

The map I wish I had had. The resources, the books, the people, the communities.

Russell Barkley on ADHD: the free lectures you should watch

The most important researcher on ADHD. His lectures are free on YouTube and worth hours of reading.

The Disruptors: finally an honest documentary about ADHD

The first documentary that shows ADHD as it is, without romanticizing or dramatizing it.

ADHD podcasts that are actually worth your time

There are not many. But the ones that exist are often excellent. Here are the ones I actually listen to.

The best ADHD books for adults I have actually read

What I read and what I thought of it. Not an exhaustive list, just the books that actually taught me something.

Things I say about my brain while laughing, and what they actually hide

«Sorry, I was somewhere else.» We laugh it off. But behind the humor, there is often something heavier.

A letter to those who feel like they do not work like everyone else

If you are reading this at 3am because your brain refuses to switch off, this letter is for you.

My brain lives in the future. What I am trying to do about it.

Always anticipating, planning, projecting. Rarely where I actually am.

What I wish someone had told me when I got my diagnosis

The day of the diagnosis, nobody explains what comes next. The relief, then the emptiness. The questions that start arriving.

I left school early. What I have understood since.

School was not built for my brain. It took me years to understand that the problem was not me.

Savoring the moment when your brain lives in the future

Being present when your brain is wired to anticipate. The daily fight nobody sees.

Too much in my head: when creativity is also exhausting

My brain generates ideas nonstop. It is a strength. It is also what keeps me from sleeping.

What actually helps me daily with ADHD (no generic advice lists)

No list of 10 tips. What I actually do, every day, to get my brain to cooperate a little. What holds, and what keeps falling apart.

ADHD and self-esteem: why everything hits harder

Twenty years of «you could do better» leaves a mark. ADHD does not just wreck your focus. It slowly erodes the image you have of yourself.

The attention paradox: focused 8 hours on one thing, unable to spend 5 minutes on another

Hyperfocus is the ADHD symptom nobody talks about, because it looks like a superpower. Until it makes you miss a dinner, forget to eat, or work until 4am on something that was not urgent.

School traces a path. Mine went somewhere else.

For some people school is a staircase. For me it was a corridor with no windows. The paths traced for some, far less obvious for others.

The path you carve yourself leads somewhere that looks like you.

Compensating. The cost of appearing normal.

For years I spent all my energy looking like I functioned like everyone else. The masking, the invisible exhaustion, and what I would have gained by accepting my difference sooner.

Accepting that I was different would have helped me sooner.

Attachment, anxiety, and what my relationships taught me about my childhood

How you were loved in your first months of life shapes all your adult relationships. It took me a long time to understand why mine followed the same pattern.

I am starting to understand where it comes from.

In long conversations, I lose my thread less often.

I did not expect anything from this one. But in long exchanges, I notice I find my words faster. I am noting it without drawing conclusions.

Too early. I will come back in 5 weeks.

I tried Vyvamind. Here is what I took away from it.

I ordered it one evening when I was at my limit. Three deadlines overdue, unable to start anything. By week 3, I noticed I was starting tasks I had been putting off for days.

Continuing. The real test will be week 12.
2024 1 entry